


Love Me, Hold Me, Squeeze Me

by musette22, paperstorm



Category: Actor RPF, Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Anxiety, Blow Jobs, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Evanstan - Freeform, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, POV Sebastian Stan, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:48:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25884607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musette22/pseuds/musette22, https://archiveofourown.org/users/paperstorm/pseuds/paperstorm
Summary: Chris grabs his junk when he's anxious. Sebastian notices.
Relationships: Chris Evans/Sebastian Stan
Comments: 45
Kudos: 284





	Love Me, Hold Me, Squeeze Me

**Author's Note:**

> We got talking about Chris’s tendency to feel himself up to calm himself down, and how Sebastian would have noticed and would use the knowledge to help Chris make his noisy mind go “sshhh”. This is pure domestic smut, set around the time of the Civil War press tour. Enjoy 😘

Chris and Sebastian are having a quiet night in.

Or that’s what it’s supposed to be, anyway. Unfortunately, Chris’s mind is churning so loudly that it almost makes Sebastian want to turn up the volume on the TV to drown out the noise. They’re on the couch in their sweats, beer and snacks to hand, a movie playing on Chris’s TV set which they thought would be interesting but is sadly not very. Chris has been restless all evening, shifting in his seat and picking at a scab on the back of his hand, not paying much attention at all to what’s happening on the screen. In turn, his restlessness is distracting Sebastian.

It’s not hard to guess what’s got Chris like this. Just the other day, he decided he wanted to take a break. Just a little sabbatical, a year to focus on himself and recover from an intense few years of working almost non-stop. Sebastian thinks it’s a great idea. He knows that Chris loves his job, but he also love being a homebody, a family man, just reading and spending time at his beautiful East Coast home, which he hasn’t gotten to do in far too long. But Sebastian also knows that while Chris may finally have made the decision, it’s going to take him a while to stop feeling guilty and conflicted about it. 

Most likely, right now Chris’s mind is yelling at him that he’s not only being lazy and selfish, he’s also jeopardizing his career and disappointing not just his fans, but himself, too. It’s unreasonable, of course, but tell that to his anxiety. That’s why Sebastian had proposed a movie night, to provide a distraction from his racing thoughts, but so far it doesn’t really seem to be working. Over the years, Chris has worked hard to learn to control his overly loud brain, but sometimes it still gets the better of him. Sebastian considers putting a finger to his lips and going “sshhh”, like Chris himself sometimes does, but he doesn’t want to risk it coming off as condescending rather than helpful.

Suddenly, inspiration strikes.

Chris, wearing a pair of worn, grey sweats, is leaning back into the couch with legs spread wide, his left knee bouncing nervously. Sebastian has never been more appreciative of the fact that Chris is a manspreader. Casually, almost like someone on a first date might yawn and stretch and settle their arm around their date’s shoulder, Sebastian slides his right hand up from Chris’s bouncing knee, up over the tense muscles of his thigh, before settling it lightly over his crotch. Palm over dick, just cupping it gently, giving it a single, light squeeze.

Chris sucks in a breath at the unexpected touch, head whirling around to him. Sebastian doesn’t turn to look back at him, just keeps his eyes on the screen, a slight frown of concentration between his eyebrows. In his peripheral vision, he can see Chris’s mouth hanging open, can feel his eyes boring into the side of his head, but he doesn’t acknowledge him. It takes a good few seconds, but finally Chris seems to get with the program and slowly turns his eyes ahead again.

Sebastian gives him another squeeze, like a reward. Chris swallows hard and noisily.

It’s not a sexual touch, not right now. It’s supposed to be a comfort thing, like having a security blanket. It’s no secret that Chris is a very tactile guy, someone who loves hugging people tightly and burying his face in their necks, loves feeling textures and soft fabrics, loves to stroke his own thighs, grab his own chest and, as it happens, his own junk – not just sexually, but often just to hold it. For comfort. All guys do, of course, just like women apparently hold their breasts, but Chris seems to like it a bit more than most. Sebastian has noticed Chris seems to do it mostly when he’s nervous, when he needs a little touch to ground him or make him feel better, so that’s what Sebastian is offering him now. It’s almost like a shoulder rub; just Sebastian taking care of his man, helping him relax.

“Seb.”

His nickname is barely a whisper, just a whiff of breath as it passes Chris’s lips. Sebastian ignores it. He rubs, ever so slightly, faint pressure of the heel of his palm massaging into the soft flesh under his hand. Chris exhales unsteadily, but keeps his eyes on the television, like Sebastian’s are. Out of the corner of his eye, Sebastian can see Chris’s hand curl into a fist against his own thigh and then uncurl slowly, fingers straightening and pushing down against his sweats, struggling to stay still.

He wants to reach out for Sebastian, to drag him into his lap and kiss him, take over like he usually does. Sebastian wouldn’t let him, just now. It’s not what this is about. It’s not what he needs.

“Remember how much fun we had training for the bridge fight?” Sebastian asks, tilting his chin toward the screen, an action sequence in the movie they’re watching reminding him of the months they’d spend working together on the complex choreography. _Intimate_ , Chris had called those scenes.

“Yeah,” Chris breathes, probably recalling, as Sebastian is, the other kinds of fun they’d had in those three months.

Sebastian walks his fingers down an inch or two. Through the fabric, still focusing his gaze entirely on the movie, he curls his fingers in underneath Chris’s balls and gently digs the tips of his fingers into the spot behind them.

When Chris twitches a little but then finally, finally melts into the couch and goes pliant under Sebastian’s touch, Sebastian smiles smugly to himself and gives Chris a long, firmer squeeze as if to say _good, that’s good_. Chris’s legs fall open a fraction further, his hand relaxes and slips off his thigh to land softly on the couch cushion beside him.

“The end one, too,” Sebastian continues, keeping the conversation casual so Chris can focus. “On the helicarrier. I miss it being just you and me.”

“You were –” Chris’s breath hitches, and then he sighs deeply and lets his head tip backwards a little. He wants to push up into Sebastian’s hand, Sebastian can tell, but he doesn’t. Sebastian resists his own urge to praise him for it, worried it might break the spell. “– so good, in that scene. So fucking good. Should’a won all kinds of awards for it.”

“You thinking I was good means more to me than trophies,” Sebastian says honestly. He squeezes again.

Chris is hardening under his ministrations, as Sebastian knew would happen sooner or later. There’s only so long a guy can have his dick massaged before that’s bound to happen. He’s not mad about it. He wants Chris to feel good, to relax, to let himself be taken care of. He deserves the peace it brings, not having to be on top of everything all the damn time. It fills Sebastian’s heart right up to the brim when he thinks about how Chris has always trusted him in a way he doesn’t trust anyone else. That over the years he’s been that safe, warm place Chris can crawl to when he needs to let his guard down.

He rubs a little more insistently, licking his own lips as arousal builds in his gut at the feeling of Chris swelling in his hand. Chris’s breathing quickens, but he’s still being so good, staying still and letting Sebastian touch him like this. He’s going to be embarrassed, later – or perhaps already is – that Sebastian’s noticed his tendency to grab his own dick to comfort himself. Sebastian wishes he wouldn’t be. He wishes Chris knew how sexy he is when he does absolutely anything.

Before long, Sebastian has all but stopped paying attention to the movie they’re supposed to be watching, though he’s careful not to let it show. The sound of Chris’s breathing growing heavier permeates his consciousness, along with the feeling of Chris’s cock filling up beneath his palm, a warm and satisfying weight in his hand. He’s happy to ignore his own arousal for the time being. Right now, it’s not nearly as pressing as his need to make Chris feel as good and calm as he possibly can.

Well, at this point, calm may be a bit of a stretch. Where Chris’s hands were lying open at his sides earlier, now he’s got them balled into loose fists, his fingernails no doubt leaving crescent-shapes imprints on his palm.

“Just relax,” Sebastian urges, keeping his voice low and soothing. “Let’s just keep watching the movie for a bit longer, alright? I like this one.”

“Uh huh,” Chris breathes, eyes still closed.

Sebastian is kind of surprised he’s not putting up more of a fight over this, but then again, Chris is now fully hard inside his sweats and Sebastian guesses maybe is dick is starting to talk louder than his brain. When he gives Chris another squeeze, a bit firmer this time, Chris lets out a little whimper that has a shiver racing up Sebastian’s spine like electricity. Jesus. He’s so _weak_ for the sounds Chris makes. Not just his growls and grunts, or the low, rumbling moans that roll through Sebastian’s body like a wave of pure heat, but the whimpers and the high-pitched sighs that fall from his lips when Chris is feeling particularly needy – open and raw under Sebastian’s attentions.

Pretending he didn’t hear, Sebastian huffs. “If they’d cast someone twenty years older in that role, maybe it would’ve been convincing.”

“Mm hmm,” Chris agrees, without actually opening his eyes to see who he means.

Sebastian bites the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling. “Knew you’d agree.”

Chris’s affirmative _yeah_ turns into a long moan when Sebastian curls his fingers fully around his length through the fabric of his pants and moves his hand up and down once, like he’s just getting a feel for it. As if he doesn’t know the dick currently in his hand practically better than his own.

And, okay, Sebastian was fully planning on dragging this out as long as possible, but he’s only human, and Chris moaning like that has him suddenly desperate to see and feel skin, makes him want to rip Chris’s clothes off and press him into the couch and ride him into the sunset. He just about manages to restrain himself, but he does let go of Chris just long enough to slip his hand under the waistband of Chris’s sweats, into the snug heat of his boxers. When Sebastian’s fingers finally wrap around hot, silky skin, already a little sticky with the way Chris has been steadily leaking under Sebastian’s touch, they both let out a sigh.

“That feel good, baby?” Sebastian asks quietly, abandoning all pretense of watching the people running around and shooting each other on their TV screen and instead turning his torso towards Chris so he can both touch and watch him better.

Chris’s eyelids flutter, his ridiculously long lashes casting shadows on his cheekbones in the low light. Sebastian bites his lip. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to the way Chris’s beauty affects him, and more to the point, he doesn’t think he’d ever want to. He loves experiencing that little thrill in his gut whenever he’s reminded that _yes_ , Chris really is that gorgeous and wonderful, and _yes_ , he really is all Sebastian’s. He’s wanted by countless people, women and men alike, and yet Chris chose _him_. Wants him. Wants him just as bad as Sebastian wants Chris, and that never fails to make Sebastian feel like he could conquer the world. 

“Yeah,” Chris breathes then, in reply to his question. His hands flex, unconsciously, where they’re lying at his sides.

“Go on,” he says, as he gives Chris dick a long, slow stroke. “You can touch yourself, too, if you want. Whatever feels good, yeah?”

Chris let’s out a shaky breath and nods slowly. Sure enough, he lifts a hand and slides it up his torso, slow and aimless, just kind of feeling himself up, petting himself because he likes touching and being touched. Eventually, his big hand cups his left pec and squeezes, massaging in a way that to someone who didn’t know him as well as Sebastian does might look like he’s putting on a show, but which Sebastian is certain is not for his benefit. When Chris pinches his left nipple between his thumb and his forefinger, he shudders, his dick twitching in Sebastian’s grip, and _fuck_. That is. So hot. Chris’s chest isn’t quite as sensitive as a woman’s might be, but he’s still more responsive to even the slightest touches than any other man Sebastian’s ever been with. Chris just _feels_ so much, emotionally and physically.

“Talk to me,” Sebastian says, as he presses the pad of his forefinger in under the swollen head of Chris’s cut cock, rubbing right where he knows it’s the most sensitive, and not letting up.

Chris just hums. He slides just a little further down the couch, head still tipped back. He reaches with his other hand and cups his own balls underneath Sebastian’s hand, squeezing them. The tip of his cock, when Sebastian swipes his thumb over it, is slick, and Sebastian wants so badly to taste him, but holds back.

Sebastian edges closer to him, so he can kiss Chris’s shoulder through his shirt. “C’mon. Tell me how it feels. You’ve been anxious, lately, hm? So talk to me about this instead.”

“So good, feels so good,” Chris breathes. “You know me.”

“Yes, I do,” Sebastian agrees. He kisses Chris’s cheek, and tightens his grip around his dick, twisting his wrist and sliding his hand up and down. “Noticed you squeezing yourself all the time when you need a little comfort.”

“Well, that’s embarrassing,” Chris laughs. His eyes finally open and he tilts his head toward Sebastian, looking at him through soft, brown lashes and with a pretty flush on his cheeks.

Sebastian shakes his head, and leans forward, asking for a kiss that Chris gives him instantly. “I think it’s cute. And sweet, and sexy as hell.”

Chris doesn’t argue, but is likely arguing in his mind because his brain is fickle like that. Sebastian doesn’t give him the opportunity to continue. He abruptly pulls his hand from Chris’s sweats and moves, sliding to his knees on the rug and pushing in between Chris’s already widely spread thighs. Chris watches him raptly as Sebastian hooks his thumbs under the elastic waistband and pulls, wrestling the fabric out from under Chris’s ass and halfway down his thighs. It squeezes his legs together, trapping Sebastian between them, forcing him in closer.

Sebastian drags his teeth over his bottom lip as he looks up at Chris, letting it slip free from them with the shine of spit on it, watching Chris’s eyes hungrily tracking the movement. Chris loves his lips, he’s never been shy about that. Sliding his hands slowly up Chris’s legs, starting along his shins, over his knees, Sebastian increases the pressure of his fingertips as they climb higher up Chris’s thighs and reach bare skin. He dips them down to bother soft, sensitive skin on the insides, following along one with his mouth, sucking kisses into Chris’s pale flesh.

Chris breathes a little heavier as Sebastian gets closer to his balls, and buries a hand in Sebastian’s hair. It’s still long, even though they’ve finished filming, and Sebastian hasn’t said this aloud but he’s keeping it for as long as he can stand it, just because he’s seen how much Chris likes pulling on it. Maybe he’ll cut it a bit, so it’s not stringy and dusting the tops of his shoulders, but keep at least enough of the length for Chris to keep playing with.

Ignoring Chris’s erection for the time being, he noses into his balls. They’re so soft and full, the hairs tickling his face, the scent of him here so thick and overwhelming it makes Sebastian’s glands tingle and his mouth water. He loves the way Chris smells, manly and earthy and just perfect.

“Honey,” Chris whispers, and his voice sounds just like it, like warm honey oozing down Sebastian’s spine. He smiles to himself and takes one of Chris’s balls into his mouth, sucking around it and delighting inside when Chris utters a string of raspy curses and his fingers pulls roughly at his handful of Sebastian’s hair.

Sebastian grins as he emerges, feeling invigorated, in his element, doing what he does best. He wraps his long fingers around the base to hold him steady, kissing up the side of his shaft. He keeps it slow, teasing, flattening his tongue and working it against the sensitive flesh, then tracing the veins with the tip of his tongue, all the while making sounds at the back of his throat that are borderline obscene and whorish and have Chris's dick trickle out more precome. Chris loves his noises just as much as Sebastian loves his.

“Hmm, look at that,” Sebastian murmurs, barely taking his mouth off Chris. “You like that? You like it when I taste you like this, don’t you?” He doesn’t wait for a reply, instead swiping his tongue over the leaking tip, lapping up the moisture that’s gathered there and moaning – a little bit for show, but mostly because he does genuinely love the way Chris tastes.

“Jesus _Christ_ , Seb,” Chris groans, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before snapping them open again, his gaze heavy and loaded as it comes to rest on Sebastian between his legs.

Sebastian soaks it up, feeling shivery with it, loved and appreciated in a way no one else has ever made him feel. He takes his time, focuses his attention on the head for a bit longer. Little kitten licks at the swollen tip, swirling it around, pressing his tongue against the sensitive underside and suckling, teasing out more of Chris’s pleasure. He gets a little lost in it, as tends to happen when he gets to indulge his oral fixation like this. When he looks back up at Chris’s face after a while, Chris already looks wrecked, overwhelmed, color high on his cheeks and his lips red and bitten.

Sebastian aches to kiss him then, feels it like a physical presence in his chest. _Later_ , he promises himself. First things first.

Without breaking eye contact, he wraps his lips fully around Chris’s cock and sinks down over it, not stopping until it hits the back of his throat. Chris lets out a heavy breath like a sigh as Sebastian slowly drags his lips back up, then sinks down again. The hands in his hair are may feel like they’re guiding him, but in reality Sebastian is in complete control. He knows his tongue alone holds the power to undo Chris completely, and while Sebastian normally prefers being taken care of, right now he wants more than anything to take care of Chris.

Chris, who is watching him with heavy-lidded eyes, adoration written all over his face as Sebastian sucks him off. Still looking up at him, Sebastian eventually sits up, but not before giving the tip a wet, sloppy kiss.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he asks, licking his lips.

Chris blinks at him, slow, like he’s having to really work to understand the question. “Huh?”

Sebastian smiles at him indulgently. “Alright, no thoughts. That’s good, baby. Just feel, can you do that for me?”

“Yeah,” Chris breathes, dragging a hand down from Sebastian’s hair to pet the side of his face, fingertips wonderingly tracing his spit-slick lips. “You feel so good.” The tip of his thumb dips inside, and Sebastian closes his lips around it. He sucks, and Chris groans. “This fuckin’ mouth, sweetheart. I don’t deserve this mouth, y’know.” 

Sebastian huffs, the puff of air brushing over Chris’s wet dick, making a visible shiver roll through him. “Chris,” he says slowly, looking Chris in the eye so he’ll get the message loud and clear. “You’re the best person I know. By far. You deserve to feel good, trust me on this.”

To emphasize his words, he spits into his hand once before wrapping it back around Chris’s cock and starting to strip it slowly, twisting his fist around the head in the way he knows drives Chris crazy. Sure enough, Chris’s jaw drops and his eyelids flutter, and Sebastian adores him so much it steals his breath away.

Suddenly, he needs to be closer, so he buries his face between Chris’s legs again. He gives Chris’s balls some more love, lapping at them, taking them into his mouth one by one and then slowly, filthily, dragging his tongue up along his shaft and swallowing him down again. He hums around him and Chris hisses in pleasure, his hips stuttering, but Sebastian keeps him down with a hand on his stomach. Sebastian is well aware that his head-game is strong, and he’s proud of it, but it’s never filled him with such gratefulness as it has since he went down on Chris for the very first time. It’s one of his fondest memories. Not only is Chris one of the most responsive and appreciative partners he’s ever had, Sebastian also wasn’t kidding when he told Chris he deserves to feel good. To be worshipped, to let go, to literally have all of his worries and fears sucked out through his dick and replaced with nothing but sated bliss, if even just for a little while.

So Sebastian gives it his best shot. Planting both his hands on Chris’s thighs, he leans in and let’s Chris’s cock slide as far into the back of his throat as he can. His own pleasure synapses fire at the familiar feeling of it constricting his airways like this and _fuck,_ but he loves being useful. Loves being used, giving Chris that mind-blowing pleasure he needs sometimes to blow those pesky thoughts clear out of his head.

Chris lets out a stuttering moan, hand tightening in Sebastian’s hair again. His hips buck as he unconsciously tries to thrust up into the heat of Sebastian’s throat around him, and once again Sebastian pins him down, determined to keep setting the pace until he has to come up for air, sucking in a rasping breath.

“Oh fuck, oh Jesus,” Chris pants, a lovely red flush spreading down from his neck and disappearing beneath the neckline of his shirt. “Baby, _fuck_ , I love you so much, I-”

If this had been their first time, Sebastian might have been insulted at those words being uttered while Chris was getting his dick wet, but as it is, it just makes something warm and glowing spread through him. He knows how deeply Chris means it. _Chris loves me. Chris thinks I’m good_. There isn’t a better feeling in the world.

Shifting on his knees, Sebastian slips both his hands between Chris and the couch cushions and grabs a handful of that gloriously firm ass. When he squeezes, Chris does thrust up into the back of Sebastian’s throat, and this time Sebastian lets him. He keeps breathing steadily through his nose while Chris puts both hands on the back of his head and pushes him down, sliding in deeper still, driven by the pure, animal impulse to follow the pleasure to its tipping point. Then, Sebastian swallows hard around him once, twice, feeling saliva and precome dribble out of the corners of his mouth and around Chris’s shaft. It’s filthy and wonderful and Sebastian is vaguely aware of how he’s hard as a rock inside his own sweatpants, and then Chris grinds in one more time, makes a guttural, growling sound. His cock pulses on Sebastian’s tongue as he shoots off down his throat, hot and salty-bitter and everything Sebastian has ever wanted.

“ _Fuck_ , honey, fucking _, ahh_ -” Chris moans, high-pitched and rough, his fingers squeezing just this side of painful in Sebastian’s long hair as he comes and comes. He’s always so mouthy, preferring swear words to almost any other word and the best of times but especially when they’re together like this. If Sebastian had been keeping a journal of the colorful, creative phrases Chris has grunted at him in moments like this, he’d be on the tenth volume of it by now, easily.

He swallows down everything Chris has, drinks it like he’s dying of thirst or like it’s the most decadent thing he’s ever tasted, which it isn’t, but at the same time it is. He keeps licking that spot under the head with his tongue, gently rolling Chris’s balls as they empty and soften, mindless about it, in a trance like it’s meditative, until Chris weakly pushes at his shoulder with a soft hiss and a happy laugh.

“Easy, kid,” he drawls, and Sebastian very nearly purrs, feeling small and owned, “you’re gonna suck it right off.”

Sebastian wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, knowing how he must look, with sweat on his forehead and a flush on his cheeks and come on his lips. If the look on Chris’s face is anything to go by, Sebastian has never been more gorgeous in his life. Chris’s eyes are glittery and soft, his smile fond, loving, as he reaches for Sebastian’s arms and pulls him up. Sebastian’s legs ache from being in the crouched position for too long, the muscles stretching back out as he climbs back onto the couch and settles in Chris’s lap. Because he can’t resist, he tucks his hand between their bodies to play with Chris’sn softening cock again, gently this time, just brushing light fingertips over it like he’s petting something small and delicate.

Chris exhales. He wraps a hand warmly around the back of Sebastian’s neck and brings their foreheads to rest together so they can watch, entwined, as Sebastian touches him where it’s sensitive.

“Can’t believe I grab my junk so often in public that people actually notice,” Chris says, the smile apparent in his quiet voice.

Sebastian chuckles. “I’m sure not everyone notices. I did because I notice everything about you.”

“Like you love me or something, huh?” Chris teases.

“Somethin’ like that, yeah.”

“I’m tactile, I guess. What can I say.”

“You are,” Sebastian agrees. “I really love it, you know. Gettin’ you all worked up over the smallest touches. Or calming you down.”

“Everything about you soothes me when my head won’t shut up,” Chris tells him earnestly. His other hand moves from Sebastian’s hip and slides around to the small of his back, pushing up under his shirt to get at his skin and then lower, slipping into the back of his pants.

“That makes me happy,” Sebastian responds, around a sigh when the soft pad of one fingertip presses at his entrance. “Not that you’re anxious. But that I can help.”

“With a junk massage.”

Giggling, Sebastian nods and pecks a kiss to Chris’s lips. “With a junk massage, yeah.”

Chris kisses him deeper, lets his tongue linger in Sebastian’s mouth. “What are we gonna do about you?”

“Whatever you want. Doesn’t have to be anything.”

“Takin’ care of you helps too, you know. Makes me feel… centered.”

“Well.” Sebastian exaggerates the word, lifting a shoulder in a half shrug. “I guess if it’s about you I can’t turn it down.”

“That’s more like it.” Chris smiles into another kiss, and his hands grip Sebastian a little tighter.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Come yell with us about these two!  
>   
> Follow paperstorm [on tumblr](http://paper-storm.tumblr.com/)  
> Follow Musette22 [on tumblr](https://musette22.tumblr.com/).


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